i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize