glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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