Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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