rhymes with "ouble enetration"
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Randomize