i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
This baby is an asshole
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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