He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
he had hair everywhere except his balls
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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