To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
