every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
