We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
The adults are the big ones right?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
