just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
