Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Congratulations! We have a period
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