oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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