You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
