i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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