Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
