Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
