Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
