I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
