you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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