Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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