Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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