we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
