I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
She bit a glass in half.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
