Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
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