My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I think I am morally bankrupt
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
