Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Randomize
