11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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