yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
