Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Randomize
