Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
