**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
