I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
