so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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