so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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