Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize