they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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