so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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