life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
