I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Randomize
