Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
