would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Randomize
