I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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