should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Randomize
