How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
honey bunches of taint.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
