Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
