My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
