after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
