I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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