My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
