therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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