yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
