In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
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